31/10/2010 by lizit.

Although this blog focuses on my DPhil journey, I am having a bit of a personal rant today.

31st October is a day which I have come to dread. Over the past few years, I have had my car and the front of my house covered with egg. Last year, a double-glazed window was broken by a bolt fired from some form of weapon. I am sitting in my study wondering what might be inflicted on us this year.

I have no personal objection to people dressing up as ghouls and witches if that is what they enjoy. I just want to exercise my right not to be any part of this particular ‘celebration’. In particular, I object to strange children, sometimes accompanied by doting parents, knocking on my door and threatening me if I do not give them some form of ‘treat’. Not opening the door seems to be taken as permission to damage my property.

In past years, we have displayed a poster making it clear we do not do Halloween. This year, we are considering whether to or not, as we wonder whether this is read as an invitation to ‘trick’ rather than a request to leave us undisturbed. Something tells me this is one we are not going to get right whatever we do.

So I am preparing to batten down the hatches and sit in darkness from late afternoon onwards in the hope that it will be assumed the house is unoccupied and unwelcome callers will keep away. On the other hand, maybe that is just inviting trouble. Roll on tomorrow when I can forget this for another year.

Rant over.

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16/10/2010 by lizit.

For a whole series of reasons, some personal, some environmental, some miscellaneous, I have been finding it very difficult to get myself focused enough to do any constructive work. I can understand why I am feeling as I am, but have been finding it difficult to do anything very much about it.

Yesterday I met a colleague for coffee. Turned out that for various reasons she was also feeling fairly disengaged.

Recipe for disaster and mutual descent into depression? Well no, it actually was an extremely positive meeting. Perhaps because we were able to be honest about how we we feeling, we were able to help each other to see it wasn’t just us being middle-aged and pathetic, but our feelings were valid - and what was more, we could do something positive that might even be helpful to others.

We all know from the books and from experience that the DPhil journey is a lonely one, but yesterday reminded me that I am not on my own. There are other people around with similar doubts and anxieties and we can not only support each other but we can be creative and revitalised by sharing and exploring.

Today is a new day with new ideas, new opportunities and loads to think about and do!

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